Friday, January 25, 2013

If You're Going to Have a Wedding...

There's a series of children's books by Laurie Numeroff that are about the chain reaction that occurs following a simple action.  One of the first book goes,

If you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to ask for a glass of milk.  When you give him the milk, he'll probably ask for a straw.   
When he's finished, he'll ask for a napkin.  Then he will want to look in the mirror to make sure he doesn't have a milk mustache. When he looks in the mirror, he might notice his hair needs a trim.  So he will probably ask for a pair of nail scissors.   
When he's finished giving himself a trim, he'll want a broom to sweep up.  He might get carried away and sweep every room in the house.  He may even end up washing the floors as well!  When he's done, he'll probably want to take a nap.  You will have to fix a little box for him with a blanket and pillow.  He'll crawl in, make himself comfortable and fluff the pillow a few times.   
He'll probably ask you to read him a story.  So you'll read him one from one of your own books, and he'll ask to see the pictures.  When he looks at the pictures, he'll probably get so excited he'll want to draw one of his own.  He'll ask for paper and crayons.  He'll draw a picture.  When the picture is finished he'll want to sign his name with a pen.  Then he'll want to hang the picture on your refrigerator.  Which means he will need... scotch tape.  He'll hang up his drawing and stand back to look at it.   
Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that he's thirsty so... he'll ask for a glass of milk.   
And chances are if he asks for a glass of milk... he's going to want a cookie to go with it.

There are other books that follow similar patterns.  If you give a moose a muffin... If you give a pig a pancake... You get the picture.  Sometimes when I think of my wedding (just four months away), this story comes to mind.  If you're going to have a wedding, you're going to have to find someone to officiate.  You're going to want guests, so you'll have to send invitations.  You're going to have to buy a dress.  Pick out flowers.  Find a photographer.  Pick a venue and a date.  If you have guests, they're going to want something to eat.  After they eat, they'll want something to drink.  After they drink, they'll want to dance.  But before they dance, they'll want to see the bride and groom dance.  If the bride dances, she'll trip over her two left feet and fall and sprain her ankle and have to go to the emergency room in her wedding dress....

I wanted something inexpensive and laid-back, something that proved I didn't buy into the whole "wedding industrial complex."  But no matter how simple my intentions, the very act of having a celebration with more than fifty people requires some degree of planning.  There's putting a deposit on a venue, giving out save-the-date cards, picking out a wedding dress (I ordered mine online!) and getting it hemmed because apparently the female intended for this dress is six feet tall.   I'm incredibly lucky to have friends and family members (both on my side and my fianc√©'s) that support my vision.  And while I wouldn't have minded just eloping or getting a justice of the peace, I think this is better.  By including all these people in our celebration, they become invested in our marriage.  Our family.  Our future.  As a natural loner, I need friendly people to keep me in the light.

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